Key Takeaways:
- Instead of figuring out how to force a teenager to go to school, parents should try to understand why their kid doesn’t want to go to school and help them address the underlying issues.
- It’s important to prioritize mental health first, then school attendance, and to avoid being too strict and enforcing school attendance, which can sometimes backfire and worsen things.
- The first step in helping a teenager refusing to go to school is to identify the root causes. A school refusal intervention should get at the heart of a teen’s avoidance of school.
- Parents can also try to help their teens develop good study habits, such as making weekly and daily plans, breaking down tasks into smaller steps, and establishing rewards.
Forcing a teenager to go to school is not the right approach. They might be dealing with mental health issues that need our understanding first. Instead of forcing them, we should try to understand what’s holding them back, talk to them openly, and seek help from counselors. It’s also vital to work with the school to create a supportive environment for them. This way, we can help them get back on track without ignoring their mental health needs.”
I am Argishti Stephanian, M.S., the Academic Director and Family Academic Advisor at Key Healthcare. My educational journey took me through UC San Diego, where I received my B.S. in Physiology & Neuroscience in 2017, and then to CSU Los Angeles, where I completed my M.S. in Biology in 2020. I understand that education is crucial for your teenager’s future. Teen school refusal and truancy can really set them back, not just in their education but also in life skills and opportunities. Additionally, in California, there’s a legal aspect to consider – both parents and teens could face fines due to Compulsory Education Laws. That’s why it’s even more important to encourage regular school attendance.
My goal is to provide practical, informed strategies to improve your teenager’s school attendance and overall well-being.”
Understanding School Refusal, School Truancy, and School Withdrawal
To better understand the various aspects of school absence, you need to know its various concepts. You might have heard the terms “school refusal,” “school truancy,” and “school withdrawal” being used interchangeably. They are closely connected because they relate to a child’s school attendance problems (SAPs), although they depict different scenarios.
School refusal is the reluctance of a child to attend school because of underlying issues like social anxiety or academic pressure. At times, they may also find it difficult to stay in school. It may manifest in different ways, including outright refusal to attend school or making up excuses like being sick. It is crucial to note that school refusal is more than just skipping classes (truancy).
Teen school truancy involves intentional and unjustifiable absence from school, mostly without the knowledge and approval of the parent or guardian.
School withdrawal occurs when a student voluntarily leaves school before completing their education. The parent or guardian mostly initiates it because of personal or family issues, health concerns, or choosing alternative educational paths, such as homeschooling or online education.
Understanding your child’s unique circumstance is the first step in deciding which route to take to help improve their school attendance.
The Prevalence of School Absenteeism
School refusal is estimated to have affected 1-5% of school-going children before the pandemic. Although there are no official post-coronavirus statistics, all indications are that the pandemic only worsened the statistics. Many children studied outside school buildings for extended periods, hence reluctant to leave the comfort of their homes. Mental health issues like depression and anxiety also skyrocketed during the pandemic, contributing to an increased absence rate in school. Picking out the early warning signs of school refusal is necessary to address the problem immediately, preventing further complications.
Why Your Adolescent Doesn't Want to Go To School
The underlying causes for school refusal are complex and may vary from one teen to another. The contributing factors may be gradual or sudden, so, understandably, you may not recognize it at first instance. But, as a primary caregiver, you need to be on the lookout for the following potential causes.
Mental Health Issues
- Mental health conditions like Teen anxiety or depression can cause school refusal.
- For instance, your teen may be anxious about fitting into social setups or making friends in school because of anxiety.
- Depression can also dampen their mood or cause them to withdraw from their peers, making school attendance unbearable.
Bullying and Peer Issues
Bullying is also a common cause of school absenteeism. Few things are as disheartening for a parent when you know your child is being bullied, and so you’ll understand your teen’s reluctance to attend school. Cyberbullying is also common nowadays; hence, you need to monitor your teen’s online presence.
Some signs that your teen may be a victim of bullying include:
- Unexplained injuries
- Lost or damaged clothes, books, electronic items, and jewelry
- Decline in grades
- Binge eating- may not eat lunch at school
- Social withdrawal
Other peer issues like friendship conflicts and social isolation may also make your teen refuse to attend school.
Academic Pressures
- Exams and schoolwork can cause stress to any school-going child, making them reluctant to go to school.
- If your child also struggles with low grades or has a learning disability, they are more likely to show signs of school refusal.
Family Issues and Stress
- Circumstances surrounding your family may also be why your child refuses to go to school.
- Such examples include parental separation or divorce, moving, being away from family, exposure to family violence, or grief over the death of a loved one.
Sexual Harassment
- There is yet another unfortunate statistic of unwanted sexual advances in school, typically by their peers, that may cause school refusal.
- An investigation by The Associated Press uncovered roughly 17,000 official reports of sexual assaults by students.
- This is only the tip of the iceberg because many of these cases go unreported.
Nine Practical Strategies for Dealing with Your Teen School Refusal
Having understood what school refusal entails and its impacts on your child, what then is your recourse as a parent? We have also compiled the following strategies to help get your teen back to regular school attendance.
1. Build a Supportive Environment
Never disregard your teen’s feelings regarding school attendance. Even the flimsiest excuses should not be overlooked, as they may indicate underlying issues. Building a supportive environment involves fostering emotional support and creating a positive atmosphere at home that would encourage your teen to speak out about their problems. Ensure open communication between all family members and actively listen to your teenager’s concerns.
A supportive family and strong social network can significantly impact your teenager’s willingness to attend school. Acknowledge their experiences, validate their feelings, and collaborate with them to find solutions to address their issues.
2. Establishing a Routine
Having a routine can significantly reduce your teen’s anxiety about going to school. A routine helps create structure and predictability. Encourage your teen to create a well-organized schedule that will include dedicated time for doing their homework, relaxing, and engaging in extracurricular activities. A routine gives them a sense of stability, making it easier for them to navigate other responsibilities and attend classes regularly.
3. Setting Realistic Goals and Holding Your Child Accountable
Guide in setting realistic goals to help teens with their academic and personal struggles. Break these goals into small manageable milestones that will help them develop confidence and power over their anxieties or other issues. The goals can be set together with their support systems in school, like teachers and friends.
Holding your child accountable does not mean punishing them when they miss the goals but giving them gentle reminders and providing any support they need.
4. Positive Reinforcement
Positive reinforcement simply means rewarding desired behaviors. You should develop a reward system to acknowledge your teen’s positive efforts and progress. The reward doesn’t have to be huge gifts but can range from verbal praise to giving them special privileges. Positive reinforcement has been scientifically proven to be very effective in many circumstances, and in this case, your teen will associate school attendance as a good and positive thing.
5. Allow Your Child to Face Natural Consequences
Once you have addressed underlying issues and have in place targeted goals and the appropriate tools and support for overcoming the underlying issues, school attendance should be expected.
Communicate your expectations to your teen and point out the natural consequences of failing to attend school. Help them understand the relationship between school attendance and academic success. If they do not follow the agreed guidelines, be firm on the consequences of their actions. Let them experience the consequences of their actions. This may include grounding them, taking away their gadgets, or any other suitable punishment.
On the flip side, if they follow agreed rules, you may reward them to appreciate their efforts. But be careful about offering rewards for school attendance, as this could lead to your teen hiding their true feelings and concerns. It would make it more difficult to address the issue causing school refusal.
6. Make Staying Home Boring
Some circumstances may require allowing your teen to miss school. For example, if they are sick, there are family issues or any other justifiable issue. In such instances, avoid creating an environment that would reward your teen for not going to school.
If your teen fails to attend school, they should not be allowed to watch TV, play video games, or get too comfortable altogether. If they have a smartphone or other electronic gadgets, take them away so they can use that time at home to catch up with what they miss in school. This will ensure they do not fall behind on their schoolwork.
7. Seek Professional Help
It is good to acknowledge what is and is not in your control. Focus on the things that are within your control and begin to seek professional help in things that are beyond your control, like teen mental health issues. Mental health experts are better positioned to understand your teen’s mental health issues because they have the necessary training and experience to diagnose and treat their issues. Key Healthcare teen treatment programs and therapy options can help you if your teen is struggling with school refusal.
School Refusal Treatment Programs
At Key Healthcare, a dedicated team of experts has developed suitable treatment programs that specifically address school refusal issues. The programs are individualized to cater to your teen’s specific needs and ensure long-term recovery. The programs include the following;
A.i Intensive Outpatient Treatment (IOP)
Teen IOP program typically takes place 9 hours weekly for 4-12 weeks at Key Healthcare’s Los Angeles, California teen treatment center. The program includes therapy sessions that help them work through the reasons for their school refusal. Your teen will not be required to spend the night at the centers.
A.ii Partial Hospitalization Treatment (PHP)
PHP for school refusal will take approximately 8 hours daily, five days a week, for 3 to 4 weeks. Your teen will be involved in therapy sessions during that period to address underlying issues and develop coping skills.
A.iii Teen Residential Treatment Program
Teen residential treatment program is a more intensive 45-60 day program in Malibu, California, where teens receive highly specialized care away from home and get support round-the-clock. It is useful for teens with serious underlying mental health conditions that may not be manageable in an outpatient setting, or whose environment is not suitable to sustain other treatment programs.
Behavior Therapy Options Used To Encourage Teens To Go To School
Behavior therapy is a collective term that refers to types of therapy that help identify and change unhealthy behaviors. It is based on the idea that behaviors are learned but can also be changed. The behavior therapy options include:
B.i Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)
Cognitive behavioral therapy for teens is a type of talk therapy to help teens address a range of emotional, psychological, and behavioral issues. It is effective in addressing school refusal because it allows teens to identify their negative thought patterns to address the mental health issues that may be making them reluctant to attend school.
B.ii Family Therapy
Teen family therapy is crucial in addressing school refusal as it involves the entire family in the therapeutic process. This approach recognizes that family dynamics may impact a teenager’s behavior. Family therapy aims to improve communication, strengthen relationships, and create a supportive environment encouraging school attendance.
B.iii Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT)
Developing DBT skills for teens is another valuable option in treating school refusal, especially when your teen has emotional regulation problems. DBT assists teenagers in managing the emotional challenges associated with attending school and how to deal with distressing situations.
B.iv Individual Therapy
Individual therapy for teens is a personalized approach that addresses the unique needs and concerns of the teenager. It is a one-on-one session where the therapist will sit down with your teen, creating a safe space to explore the underlying issues together.
8. Collaborating with the School to Create a Supportive School Environment
You should take an extra step by reaching out to the school to ensure it offers a supportive environment that would encourage your teen to attend school. Ask about possible factors contributing to school refusal, like bullying or conflicts with peers or teachers.
Keep an open communication channel with the school administration that will bring to the teachers’ attention any unique issues your teen may be struggling with. With this information, they can build a safe environment where your teen will feel more comfortable attending school. For example, the school can develop an anti-bullying policy that would outline the expected behavior of students and the consequences of a student who is proven to be a bully.
9. Explore Other Resources to Help with School Refusal
If you ever feel overwhelmed by your teen’s school refusal, there is no need to suffer in silence. There are various resources you can utilize to address the issue. The resources include school, community, and government-based resources.
School-based Resources
Each school has different personnel you can reach out to help you with the issue. They include:
- Guidance Counselors – They can assist your teen with their academic or personal issues and even refer them to other people or agencies in a better position to help them.
- School Social Workers – They can help your teen with any issues interfering with their attendance and link them to other agencies that may assist.
Community-based Resources
Community-based resources include organizations or self-help groups that help deal with various community problems. Examples of community-based resources that may assist in teen refusal include:
- Youth Organizations – These organizations provide mentoring and peer support to the child. Such groups often have engaging activities where your teen can interact with peers and develop skills and interests in various areas.
- Mental Health Clinics – These are facilities that can offer professional help for your teen if they are struggling with mental health or emotional regulation issues.
Government Resources
The government can help intervene in school refusal issues through various departments and agencies.
- Department of Education – The department oversees the overall education system and sets the necessary standards and guidelines, including provisions for school attendance. You can contact your State’s Department of Education to inquire about any guidance on school attendance, especially on the compulsory education laws.
- Department of Child Services – This is the agency tasked with protecting the welfare of children. If you are a caregiver concerned with your teen’s welfare, you can reach out to see how they can help.
Conclusion
In closing, as you navigate the challenges and complexities of teen school refusal, your role should be carefully guiding your teen instead of forcing them back to school. First, identify the cause of the issue, then develop strategies around that particular issue.
Always collaborate with the school to ensure that all possible causes of school refusal are effectively addressed. If you need professional help, contact the Key Healthcare team for the best individualized treatment. Remember to take each day at a time, embrace your child’s unique journey, celebrate achievements, and know you are not alone.
This is a personalized program developed by a special team together with the parents’ input that specifies a student’s academic goals and how to achieve them. It is designed to meet the unique needs of students with learning challenges. It helps such students succeed academically by addressing specific issues in their learning environment, thus improving school attendance.
Long-term effects include missing out on career opportunities that greatly impact a child’s future quality of life. It may also harm their social development and relationships.
Schools and parents can utilize virtual online platforms like Zoom to facilitate remote learning. Schools can also use technology to track school attendance and share learning materials.
If your teen consistently shows signs of distress and anxiety whenever it is time to go to school and is reluctant to go, it may indicate a need for therapy. You should also monitor any changes in their behavior, like social withdrawal.
Yes. Such teenagers are eligible for special accommodations through Individualized Education Plans that outline specific adjustments to ensure they can participate in school activities while managing their health conditions effectively.
Parents can differentiate them by paying attention to the consistency of the behavior. If it is persistent and accompanied by emotional distress or other behavioral changes, it may indicate a more serious issue. Always have open conversations with your teenager to know their concerns.
